Parenting Challenges: Favoritism

Favoritism is everywhere, in the work place, among colleagues and friends.

It is a reality.

Favoritism exists even in our family. When asked parents would automatically say that they treat their kids with fairness, which is ideal. But being ideal does not necessarily mean it is being followed by everyone. Whether parents are in denial or are totally oblivious, it is a family issue that may seem insignificant but in actuality has great emotional impact on the child. While the child is young the effect may not be obvious but as the child grows the effects emanate loudly through the child’s actuation and behavior.

It is something worth discussing about and worth sharing our insights and experiences with. Before relationships in the family become sore and irreparable let us give each other a helping hand and find ways and means to lessen if not completely eradicate favoritism in our family. The discussions might just be a heaven sent answer for inexperienced parents, and consequently saving a child from emotional turmoil.

 

What will I do when ……

…… I feel annoyance to one of my kids (for whatever reason) and a favorable inclination towards the other?

Please feel free to share your thoughts on this.

 

-Mitchelle-

 

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10 thoughts on “Parenting Challenges: Favoritism

  1. I have four kids, 3 boys and a baby girl. I always tell my boys that each of them is our favorite.. favorite kuya.. favorite diko and favorite sangko.. but I also tell them that our super duper favorite baby is Sati.. we’ll she’s the only girl in the family! Of course, the truth is, our love for them are all the same

  2. Hmmm…I really don’t know. I’m always very conscious about including all of my kids…so that none of them would feel rejected. Our eldest, he’s 4 and 5 years older than his brothers, there’s a tendency to neglect him because he’s already independent, while the other two need to be reined still.

  3. I only have 1 baby and 1 brother which for the longest time I considered as my very own baby coz he’s a special child – now most of my attention is on my baby and I’d feel like nagseselos sya. Ang hiraaaaaapp!!!

  4. I think it’s just normal if a parent feels closer to one child over another. Sometimes it’s just a matter of personalities matching. But I think parents should be wise enough to realize if they’re favoring one over the other and adjust how they treat their kids. We should just pay attention more and be more intentional in our parenting.

  5. I once asked my sister about this because I only have one son and I’m really curious. She said, she has no favoritism, the love is the same pero iba lang talaga yung treatment because each child has different personality.

  6. My Mom said to me the other day that she does not favor my brother and myself over the other…she says we are both different and she loves us equally but in different ways…whatever that means…lol.

  7. You are right–favoritism is a part of life that we all have to deal with. I definitely see it most frequently where I work, and I constantly try to have to overcome that.

    Great points made–following your blog now 🙂
    ~Cathy~
    OurMiniFamily.com

  8. I agree a bit. I have one biological son and 2 step sons I have raised the past 10 years. It is an internal struggle to not favor my bio son, but I try not to let that surface

  9. It is very hard not to have favorites amount your kids, especially if one is more thoughtful or more annoying than the other. We just need to be careful with ourselves also, to be aware when we are dealing with our kids, that we should be fair.

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